Today I want to write about something different, about the “three gardens” idea presented in “Zyciologia” book by Milosz Brzezinski. This book is extremely interesting, but available only in Polish. I’m not sure why the author did not decide to publish also in other languages, but think it is big loss. This book presents in a simple way the dilemmas with which modern humans are confronted. It includes also a lot of small, but simple tricks “how to live and not go crazy”, but without imposing an ideal solution – because the author makes it clear that there is no such thing.
Ok, but what about is “three gardens” idea? It’s a fundamental part of this book. Imagine you are a gardener and must care for three gardens. These gardens are not ordinary. In theory, they are separated, but during the day you see a lot of connections and influences between them. After the lecture I have to say, I really like this idea, because it allows us to “monitor” these gardens. Let’s check their details.
First garden in work. Yes, your work. There are some people who say that work is not important, but it is not true. In a normal world, work, doing something is just required to live: thanks to work you can earn money, buy food, services, fuel, everything you really need (or even do not need, but you want to have it). On the other side, work cannot be an escape from other responsibilities that await us in life, and a lot of people try to do that.
The second garden is your home and your family. Just one hundred years ago everything was simpler in this garden: man was in the work or at war, wife was at home and care about children. Division of duties was easy and imposed by society. Right now, our homes work in a different way, we mix all roles, both sides can go to work and build career, we also often work from home so it’s even more complicated. In developed and prosperous societies people have great opportunities, but also have to talk more often about emotions – and it is sometimes difficult. When we were busy ensuring our livelihood, there was no time for something like that, no time to change our mind. Now it’s common, but not always good. If we will not talk, won’t be honest, there will be a lot of arguments.
The latest garden is “myself” and it’s about our passion (or road to discover it if we did not do that already). It is also about our health, our physical and mental condition – we should remember that, if not, we will feel unfulfilled and tired. Just try to focus on all except yourself and after some time listen to friends about their trips, experiences etc. There is a high chance that you will be full of envy.
As I mentioned, all hardens are connected in some way and it means, if you forget about one of them, sooner or later you will see damaging effects also in the other two. If you forget about two of them… sorry, really better not to try. Of course, everyone decides for themselves, but why not care about all three gardens?
Does it require time? Yes of course. Does it require effort? Oh yes, no doubt.
But it’s worth it and that’s the true balance of life.