Journey matters more than goal

Whoow, last time I added a blog post was in June, a long time ago, but many important things changed in my life, and I really did not have time for this part. It will never be like it used to be, but finally I found some time to write about my latest journey. My journey into myself, about a lot of pain, mistakes but also wonderful conclusions. Hope it will be nice to read for you but must warn: this post is a bit emotional and open, please respect that.

First 100 km run

Three weeks ago, I did my first 100 km run. According to many, many people, and friends, it was crazy idea: I have been running more for just a year. Of course, I ran a lot of times during recent years, but half marathon was always maximum distance, also my running was not regular. Every time the weather was good, cycling won. It was my biggest hobby. I loved that and cycled a lot in the local area and not only. The record was 400 km, one day (and night) long trip from my city to Baltic Sea, spending 2 hours there, going back by train on the second night and cycling a few more kilometers to my city. It was an amazing trip, but without any pressure. I was with a good friend, we often made stops, of course had some “crises” and required long rest after the whole journey, but no pain, no issues.

This 100 km was different. It was not a big competition, this event calls “Bike & walk marathon around Lubin”, there are few distances to choose, and it is not a race: there is time limit, but the general idea is to promote activity and discover local areas, because path avoid cities, even smaller towns and leads through forests, meadows, and fields. The goal is to visit ten special places and add stamps on the map you received during the start. Most of these points are in forests, without any people – just a box on a tree with a stamp inside. I cycled those three times, but never along the planned, “red route” because it did not make any sense, especially on cyclocross bike. This time I had an opportunity to do that, also during night. The weather was good, we were accompanied by the moon, the stars, and the sounds of animals such as wild boars. The plan was simple: try, run and walk, because there is nothing wrong with trying and failing.

Mistakes and pain

I made a lot of mistakes, and it was a good lesson. The most important was related to nutrition. There were two food points. First on about 33 km, second about 77 km. I didn’t drink enough (realized that I drank only about 300 ml in first 30 km), second it was too much sweet snacks. It is fine for shorter distances, but not for something like that. Also, I did not have enough food generally and my supplies ran out after about 50 km – had to walk/run 27 km without anything. Later, I felt it very much. The last ~30 km was almost constant pain and mental fight: like pain waves, starting from feet, through buttocks and back. Again, and again. A lot of thoughts like “I have enough, I want to end this, I should stop and call them to bring me back”. Few stops to check feet: slightly swollen, but no blisters or alarming changes so I kept walking.

Last 10 km or even more we ran. Why? It was faster than walking, so I preferred that way, to finish pain and rest earlier. Also, the closer I got to the finish line, I felt better, it was crazy. Finally, the finish line… quick rest, went to my car and back home, fortunately it took only a few minutes.

After the battle

When I got home, I felt… not bad. I ate something small, took a shower and then I started to collapse. A huge feeling of exhaustion and I only wanted to sleep. I slept only about two hours. Not sure why, maybe because I was too tired, maybe because of emotions. Emotions… When I woke up, I started… crying. Everything in me exploded, everything was released – it was not physical pain, it was happiness and sadness at the same time.

I have been tired many times after cycling or racing, but I have never experienced such mental ecstasy after an effort. Never ever, I swear. It was something like crossing “the thin red line”, without the option to return. When I think about that right now, when I write these words, it still stirs up emotions. Maybe this is how the warriors felt after the battle? I am not sure, but I know one thing: I want more. It beckons me, attracts me. After these three weeks, I know one thing: I will never again be like I was before. It changed me in many aspects. I am not crazy, I do not want to devastate my body, so I am not going to throw myself over much longer distances, but I will push forward, kept walking. There is no “impossible”, everything is just a matter of time.

Last weeks showed me one important thing: we should find time to celebrate, to experience it internally once again, but like a spectator, like observe ourselves during meditation. Then we can appreciate our own efforts and be happy, be proud – no one can take that away from us, no one can undermine it, we know we did that, and it is all. Finish line, the goal? Yes, they are important, but everything happens in the way, not after. Reaching the destination point does not change us, the whole journey does. Our life is one of these journeys, so it should always be clear, but it is not, and we need to remind ourselves of this.

Remote work: experiences and risks

Last time I helped with some studies and answered some questions about remote work and my experiences. I decided to share all of them, but there is one problem: questions and answers have been translated, so maybe not perfect.

What made you decide to work remotely?

To be honest, it was a coincidence – I was an active user of one of the Polish portals dealing with IT, I also contributed to its pages in the form of a blog. After some time, the editors offered me the chance to join them as a normal employee, only those working remotely (the editors had their permanent office in Wroclaw). The next step was to work as a programmer for a foreign contractor, from the very beginning remotely. I have been working this way for almost ten years now.

What are the risks of working remotely? I’m referring to aspects of mental health and social life.

Remote work isolates us from other people. From my own experience: as long as we work with people at home and participate in online meetings, it is not so bad. When we don’t have people at home with us, we quickly feel very lonely and depressed, perhaps without even realizing why.

Man – even the most introverted one – is a herd animal and nature cannot be fooled. The lack of direct contact with people at work has other implications as well: first of all, during online meetings it is more difficult to express emotions, to be as open as during a real conversation face to face. Remote work does not provide as many chances to talk about non-work related topics, which are very important in a situation where we interact with others for a third of the day. As a result, it is also more difficult to build lasting relationships, camaraderie. This can be seen, for example, in the situation when someone leaves the company – other people get over it much faster, because the broken relations were never as strong as they could have been in direct contact.

Another aspect is the interpenetration of private and professional life – it is hard to avoid it, it is hard to completely detach from work when it is literally at your fingertips. Things are not made easier by the fact that in the case of office work we always take it with us, because it is in our head. It’s not a machine in a factory that we leave at the end of a shift. All this can also have a negative impact on private relations with loved ones.

Another issue is physical health. When we can work at home, the issue of transport to work is eliminated: walking, commuting by car, public transport or bicycle. Unfortunately, this lack of movement affects us negatively and it is not only about the growing weight. The problem is what happens to our body as a result of constant sedentary work, significant weakening of hips.

What kinds of people adapt the fastest to working remotely? What kind of people have trouble with it?

Based on my own experience and observations from the industry, introverts tend to cope best. Such people do not need constant, direct contact with other people, remote work can be a perfect asylum for them, especially when the internal policy of the company does not require very active participation in online meetings (even turning on the webcam). Of course, this is a big simplification, pandemic time has forced people who prefer direct contact and “office noise” to switch to remote work. This will of course be a limited, subjective assessment, but such people have also coped very well in the new reality. A bigger problem may be work organization and motivation. For those who rely only on external motivation, orders coming from above, remote work can be difficult: the lack of direct stimuli, contact and discipline can make it impossible to perform duties.

How do you think remote work should be organized? That is, how to work effectively and not go crazy?

Remote work requires self-discipline first of all. If someone imagines it as a work with a laptop in bed or on the couch, such a vision will quickly fall when confronted with reality. It is impossible to work in such a way, because we will not feel like working and everything will come to us with much more difficulty. Procrastination or Parkinson’s law – these elements appear very quickly without introducing at least a bit of a plan and routine. A good solution is to have a separate room to work in, and to stick to some rigid hours. Even an element such as dress is important: dressing a little more formally makes it feel like you’re moving from a home role to a corporate one.

As an industry worker and IT enthusiast at the same time, I see a lot of problems that are either barely talked about or completely ignored, even though they have a devastating effect on work. For me, the biggest problem was overwork – most often identified with e.g. social networks, but also taking place at work. Trying to make remote work synchronized doesn’t make sense: constant notifications from the company’s messenger, countless online meetings and checking email too often makes it impossible to focus and, as a result, to perform one’s duties well – entering the so called “flow state”, where we are focused on the task and simply realize the solution to a problem becomes basically impossible. Personally, I decided to take a more asynchronous approach and whenever possible I reserve time during the day to work in focus. If at that time someone else in the team needs my help, the world will not collapse if they receive it in an hour, not immediately. This is also where the phenomenon of FOMO comes into play – again, associated with social media, yet manifested in remote work where a lot of the same things happen.

In the case of companies where the calendar is important and solutions are used to observe and modify the calendars of other employees, it is extremely important to control our own: if we do not do it, someone else from the company will do it for us, e.g. by imposing on us online meetings that may not (yet) be necessary and individual matters could be pre-arranged in another way that will not interrupt our work.

Is it possible to maintain a balance between remote work and personal life?

Yes, although a lot depends on the specifics of the job itself. I’ve been working at a US-based startup for over five years now, and in retrospect I have to say that such work changes a person. I jokingly call it “post startup stress syndrome”, but if you take a closer look, you will stop laughing. When the company was in the period of looking for investors, fighting for them at all costs, being available all the time, not regular working hours were a standard. It often happened that we worked from morning till late evening “because there was a fire” or “because at the last moment we have to prepare something for a demo with a client”. I think, however, that it would be difficult to avoid such phenomena also in stationary work – it’s just the specificity of this market and this stage of company’s development. Today we are much bigger, we are “civilizing” and we can – if only we want to – change habits. There is now stability, normal working hours, clear vacation policy, long-term planning and no one is rushing around at the last minute. Unfortunately, this is not clear to everyone. Many people – including myself – are used to working in the form of “wild west” and consider the stabilization changes as a symptom of stagnation and growing bureaucracy. Without a change of mindset, this risks professional burnout. I thought several times about leaving the company, but did I have a guarantee that the “grass at my neighbor’s” is not just painted green? Besides, without changing my internal approach, it wouldn’t help.

In the context of separating remote work and private life, I will mention again the self-discipline and environment: a separate place is essential. Good, noise-cancelling headphones, if possible also separate company equipment, on which we use only company applications. Besides, it is definitely not a good idea to use company applications (mail, messengers) on a private phone – both for security reasons and due to the fact that the two worlds are mixed. If we have access to company’s mail on our own phone, it will be enough, for example, to take a second before going to sleep to have a look and, as a result, have a night full of work-related dilemmas. Instead, after a certain hour, we should completely disconnect from corporate matters: take care of our loved ones, go outside, play sports and take up a hobby. This allows us to maintain a healthy balance, although I would add that it is not something “to tick off”. It’s a process, requiring us to pay attention and respond, just like a growing plant.

Would you like to go back to a stationary job?

Despite some discomforts associated with remote work, I can’t imagine going back to a full-time job, at least not full-time. In the case of our team, we meet a few times a year at corporate headquarters for a few days and it’s a great time for face-to-face brainstorming and integration. If I had the opportunity, I would consider working in a hybrid model such as assuming one day a week in the office. I believe that such a combination of “both worlds” could positively affect both the psychological condition of employees and the efficiency of the entire company.

The disadvantages of minimalism

I can say that I am minimalist and I really like this idea: it allows me to make my life a lot simpler, I do not have to care about a lot of things and can focus mostly on experiences. Of course, it is like all things in the world, so it has its drawbacks. I do not want to see only advantages, and say that minimalism is great for everyone, because that would not be true. Some minimalists do not like to discuss about downsides, but I prefer to be open, it always good time to thing, how can I use this in my life in better way: such ideas are not to use them in 100% to be super strict, but to be flexible and use what you really need. So, let’s discuss minimalist downsides. 

Long decision making 

It is a real issue. Because I do not want many things, I prefer less, but with higher quality, I usually spend more and more time choosing the best option before I buy something. In theory, it is fine, because we want focus on quality, but unfortunately, it has a lot of negative effects. First of all, we have to spend more time choosing things… Things! So, it may be a bit strange, because with minimalism, we want to free ourselves from things. Never-ending comparisons, advantages/disadvantages lists, quality/price ratios etc. It is just tiring and sometimes after a few days (or even a few weeks) I just reject the purchase plan, because I feel totally exhausted and think “no, I do not want this crap anymore!”.  

Second option: I use very consumer-friendly rules in Poland and buy, check something and return to shop if I decide it will not cover all my requirements. Such law allows customers to try things (of course in limited way) and then decide and I think it is fine in current situation. I used that when I looked for a new sports watch, I tried a few options and finally chose Garmin – before that I was not a big fan of that company, because I saw a lot of complaints. After a few months of usage, I am still fully satisfied and think it was a good choice. How to deal with long decision making? I think the basic thing is to really deep investigation and question “do I really need that thing?”. It is possible that if we will hold off on a purchase decision, for let’s say a month, we come to the conclusion that we do not really need it. 

It is possible we will try to convince other people  

 If we are minimalist, we will see “a lot of unnecessary things” in many situations and there is always risk, that maybe we will want to discuss that with other people, also try to convince them to change their mind and their lives. Discussing interesting things is always good, but pushiness is very, very bad. Maybe we transformed our life to minimalist-style, because we felt bad with tons of things, but what if different people do not have any problem with that and they just like what they have? It is super important to not try convince others, it is better “to be a good example”, but nothing more. If they are interested in our approach, they will ask us – and it is a good time to talk about minimalism, not before that. 

It is a big problem especially in relationships. People are different and it is of course possible that both of you will like minimalism, but it is also possible that the second side will prefer something completely different. What then? Nothing, do not try to change second person! Never! It is the best way to break a relationship, not to build a beautiful pair. If you have some usual problems like too many clothes out, just discuss about that and set some boundaries, but do not try to be “the only one source of truth”, because you are not: you have your opinion, second side has her own and it is fine.  

Always too much  

If you are a minimalist, you can always think that you have too many things. It is a never-ending story, especially if you decided to go to the minimalist “step by step”, removing one thing, then another, then another etc. I think such an approach is fine, but in reality, there is no something like “breakthrough”, there is no real time when you said “I cleaned up my things”. It may be problematic, because we can remove some things only for ideas, but without real reason. I can say that I made some decisions and after some time I regretted them – because in reality, I did not need some things only in a specific period, and when I needed them again, there was nothing.  

We can see similar problems with a lot of ideas: it is because we want to be very strict with someone’s idea and we completely forget about our life. Once again, as I mentioned in the beginning: minimalism is for the people, not the people for minimalism, so think about your decisions and be as flexible as possible. Use only some rules if you prefer them, abandon assumptions which do not fit your situation and your life. You can sleep on a mattress in an empty apartment and if you think it is fine for you, then ok, but doing something like that only for minimalism idea? It is absurd, nothing good.  

A minimalist can be stingy 

Yep, it is true. A minimalist can be stingy, because as I mentioned above, such a person will think a few times before will buy something. It means, there is a greater likelihood that such a person will also think about the real price of a new thing i.e., not only money, but also time required to earn that money, time to maintenance that thing and all others. In many situations minimalists can decide that they will not buy things because all advantages are not worth such price. Is it bad? I think not, I we do not go to extremes: sometimes we should definitely buy something (new clothes), also sometimes we should have some spare parts, not buy new things under time pressure, when something is really missing. Overall, it can be an advantage, especially now, on very interesting times.  

Gifts 

Maybe it is not a huge problem specific for minimalists, but definitely for their families and friends who are not minimalists. In the past I received some nice gifts, but after just a short period I realized that I do not need them at all. What then? It is a problem, I can give it to others, I can sell them (and maybe buy something more relevant for me), but from a sentimental viewpoint, it is always a problem – we often do not want to do it because we think it is wrong and not fair. It is a big problem especially when we receive a gift from very close people.  

How to handle that? I think the best thing is to tell others that we do not need all these things, and maybe a better gift will be something like discount coupon, carnet for a massage or something like that: something we can use, experience, not thing. If our family and friends know that we prefer minimalism, it will be better for both sides: them (always simpler to choose the best gift) and also us, because we will not receive unnecessary things anymore.  

How asynchronous communication can help in productivity

The time of the pandemic meant that a lot of us had to work remotely. For me it was nothing new, because I’ve been working this way for a decade. Nevertheless, the changes were very noticeable, especially in communication methods. Lot of people decided to move to online meetings and this has become the basis for many companies. Is it good? In my opinion and based on my experience, it depends. In many cases, especially if we talk about developers, it is not a good approach. Google example of a completely different solution is Basecamp: they have been using asynchronous communication for years and the company still exists without any issues. I also tried that and have to say, it works.

Synchronous vs asynchronous

First of all, we have to talk about differences between synchronous and asynchronous communication between people. It is very similar to communication in IT work: by synchronous we mean for example online meetings. Both sides can talk to each other, can discuss in real time, ask questions, get feedback and quickly make decisions. Asynchronous is a different approach, here emails are a good example: we do not know when exactly the receiver will read our message and will decide to send a response. It is something like a “fire-and-forget” rocket. We should not be interested in immediate action. It means asynchronous communication is slower, but also gives more time to both sides for reaction. 

Focus – key to productivity 

If we want to be productive, we should focus on important (and sometimes urgent) things. A lot of work needs deep focus, flow to be done in the right way. There is a problem with synchronous communication: in most cases it is like an interlude, distraction. With a lot of distractions – like smartphone notifications – focus work is not possible. Why? Many studies say that you can change your focus object just for a minute, but after that you will need more than 20 minutes to focus again on your previous work. Do you write a book, but decide to make a quick call with your friend? No problem, but you will need time to focus on your book again. Every time. The same is with “divisibility of attention” – some people say that they can do that, but studies do not confirm this. We can quickly switch context, but it does not mean that there is no price for that. Price is very high: we lose our concentration and cannot resolve complex problems. 

Unnecessary meetings

As I mentioned above, in theory synchronous meetings are better, because we can discuss issues and make decisions immediately. Unfortunately, it is only a theory and a rare case, only for very simple things. If we have to consider more complex topics, like software architecture, business dependencies, impact of the change on the current state, we will need more time. In such scenarios, I often had planned meetings just to ask me some questions. It was not possible to answer them immediately, I had to check some things, gather more information and then prepare possible solutions and… plan a second meeting for that. The question here is: do we want to resolve issues, create something amazing, or just spend more and more time on meetings?

In effect, such meetings only created chaos and destroyed focus – imagine you have just one such meeting in the middle of the day. It will probably block you from completing some things before, and also you will have to spend more time after meeting to go back to your work. Better option here is asynchronous communication, definitely. First side can prepare questions, check them deeply and send them to the receiver. Then the second side will have more time to check them, prepare all required things and… no, not make a meeting, but also send info to the first side. Additional advantage: both sides can reserve some time to handle received items. We should not interrupt our current work and do new things immediately, because then we will lose all benefits. 

Wrong approach to email

Different matter is email and how we think about that service. I remember that many years ago, before I worked on really interesting things, I liked browser extensions or desktop apps to check my email accounts and notify me about new messages. It was like an addiction, similar to the current situation with ex. likes on social media. New message = new notification = a bit of dopamine. Right now I do not use any desktop email client, and do not have notifications on mobile. It allowed me to resolve one issue, but second is how other people handle their emails. Some people are able to send email and… actively wait for an answer. If they do not receive an answer in a few minutes, they will use different communication channels to ask about the message. It is completely crazy – if you have urgent things to handle, do not use emails, simple.

Wrong approach to chats

Chats are similar, really. I remember times, when in Poland we used a local messaging app called “Gadu-Gadu”, it was in my school days and we used them only on computers because there were no smartphones. It was simple, because there was a clear “activity status” and we knew, when our friends were online. When smartphones started to be popular and developers created next and next messaging apps, things started to change. Right now, I often see people who think that chat should be synchronous. If I write to you, you should read that and respond as soon as possible. The question is: why? Who decided that? Did we sign any contract related to that? I really do not remember anything like that, so it is a bit strange for me. Such an approach can only bring a lot of frustration, especially for the sender: such a person will wait and lose a lot of time. Again, if things are super important and urgent (remember, most things are not!), just call, not write, because you do not know what the other side is doing at the same time. 

Even if you are “in the middle of a discussion”, you should not expect immediate answers. I know some very impatient people, they can send you messages and after a few minutes send… question marks, or “hello?” or something similar. It is also crazy and please – if you do something like that, stop right now. You will not make any friends with such an approach. It is much better to treat chats, apps like Slack, Discord, Teams or even messaging apps like Messenger, WhatsApp, Signal etc. as an asynchronous tool. More comfortable, but still asynchronous. Remember, that second side can just disable notifications for such apps or not use them – for example I do not use any messaging app on my phone, only calls and standard text messages (sms). 

When synchronous communication is better

Ok I wrote a lot about situations when synchronous communication is bad, but… we are people and synchronous communication is part of our life, so probably it also has advantages. Yes, definitely. It is the best choice if we want to collaborate, do the same thing at the same time. Real use-cases: product manager can work together with designer to create new layout or two architects can plan database schema and discuss required fields. In these scenarios real time discussion will be much better. Conclusion: use it when you want to work together, not to ask about very complex things, because probably it will require more time, more focus and some data gathering. 

Also remember that not all people can handle asynchronous communication in a good way: it is not only a skill issue, but our personality. I think asynchronous with more focus time is better for introverts, and more direct communication will be better for extraverts. The key is to find the golden mean: we work in teams, so not only our product is important, but also our relations inside the team. If we forget about that, then we will work only asynchronously: alone, and it will be not fun. 

Few words about FOMO effect

We live in busy times and often look for something to slow down, even if only a bit. Today I would like to raise the issue of FOMO: fear of miss out. Some people think it is a new phenomenon, but also limit it to only one activity. Last time I made some observations and had additional thoughts about that. Unfortunately, these thoughts are not optimistic: it looks like we have to face this a lot more often than we think. Fortunately, there are many options to handle this issue. 

Social Media

Most people think that the principal reason for the FOMO effect is social media. I think it is not true, but this effect is the most visible probably right there. It is because a lot of social media have been created (and are still developed) to bring our attention, our time. Such services are not free. We do not have to pay using dollars, we pay using our time and information about us we share with service providers. Many of our friends use the same social media like Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat or Twitter so it is very easy to check what they are doing, what they achieve etc. Most of these platforms also offer chat so everyone can send us messages quickly. As a result, the risk of the FOMO effect is very high: we are more and more dependent on the platform and we can think that everything is important, we should know about all these updates on feeds. Of course, it is not true.

Solution 

I will not write “just do not use social media, remove your Facebook account”. It is simple, but I think it is better to treat such platforms like a hammer – a tool for nailing, but nothing more. I like the marketplace; I use some groups (especially local communities) and follow local events. For that, social media can be helpful. On the other hand, I stopped following most of my “friends” – in quotes, because I do not often have contact with most of them. For me, it does not make any sense to know what they are doing. I also removed social media apps (including messenger, whatsapp etc.) from my phone and informed all important people: if there will be something urgent, call me. Do not write on chat and wait for a reply, because I do not know when I will read your message.

TV and news websites

You can find the FOMO effect also on TV and new websites. I live in Poland, and the war in the Ukraine was a “great example” of how it works. All media, all news websites informed about the course of the war, all the time. It was normal, Ukraine is very close, just abroad. We all followed this news and also wanted to help, but if we still and still and still watch TV or read news only to “keep all things in touch”… it does not make sense. We as individual people cannot stop the war, we cannot impact it in any way, but we can still feel that we should know about everything. Why?

Solution
Do watch TV and do not read news websites all the time. In reality, we should do this as little as possible, because most of the news is negative (to bring attention). For people addicted to news, it may be “brutal”, but the fact is we cannot do much. On the other hand, we can still live, care about our families and work. It is more important.  

Knowledge

What about personal development? The current world is a real rat’s race, but if we join it without thinking, we will be just stupid. I made a lot of mistakes and I think I wasted a lot of time. Example: I decided to learn Spanish and tried a few different ways, flashcards, music, writing something in this language etc. It was fine, it was something new but after time I still cannot say that I can speak Spanish. Why? Because I was learning without real usage, without practice. There was no opportunity or need to go to Spain. Of course, it was not totally wasted time, but I could have spent it in different ways and learned something closer, more necessary. Why did I do that? Because I felt that all people around me are doing something “for the future” and I also should do that.

Solution

Do not learn unnecessary things. Yes, I know, it is hard to say what is necessary and what is not necessary, but see this example: maybe you are a JavaScript developer. You can learn TypeScript and more JS to improve your current abilities, your current position, or you can spend the same time learning Java “by the way”, without a good plan. What will give you real benefits? If you want to change work and move to Java, then it is fine, but if there is only a small chance like “maybe in the future I will be a Java engineer”, then it does not make any sense. It is only an example, but fits to the overall knowledge. Life is too short to be a master of everything. 

Investing

We can observe the FOMO effect also while investing or saving. Last month we could observe high NTF and cryptocurrencies popularity. I am not a big fan of them, because in many places it is just a scam, like Tulip mania during Dutch Golden Age. I understand how it works, but I do not see real value, even if the US dollar also does not have real value right now (that’s true since the U.S. government broke away from the gold standard). Sometimes I feel that I make a mistake by not spending more time on NFTs and crypto… a lot of people I know do that and they often talk about these topics – it may be encouraging and skipping that may be a problem for a lot of us. I prefer a “more stable” investment option, even if it means lover revenues. 

Solution

Do not care about other people and what they are doing. You should create your investment plan and do not change it often. Changes means you are not stable. Also, just look at for example Forex stats: 95% of people lose most of their capital in a short period of time! Second thing: if you do not understand some aspects like NFT, do not try them. It is possible that even your neighbor invests in NFTs, but it is also possible that he does not understand them and real risk. Think about the risk you can accept and use only things in your “comfort zone”. Really, it is a better option for money you earned by hard work. 

Sport, hobby

More than a year ago I wrote that I removed my Strava account. After some time, I created it again… and then I removed it again. Right now, I do not use it and do not see any reasons to come back. For many people it is just a training tool – and it is fine. I do not need Strava, because I use my device sport platform, it provides me with more accurate and more helpful data. Other people want to observe friends or inspire based on different activities. We can use this example also on other hobbies. There is nothing wrong with inspiration from time to time, but what if we do something only because… other people do that? For me it does not make any sense and I decided to follow my own path – I have my goals, I want to try many different things, so I do not need external motivation. Also, comparing yourself to others does not make sense: it is always better to compare your current results with your previous results. Then you can talk about progress, changes etc.

Solution

If you have your goals in sport or other hobbies and follow different people, it is fine. If you build your goals based on different people’s activities then it is strange. Remember that you have only one life. It is not a game, you cannot save a game, try one option, then load and try different. If you will rely only on 

Work

After the pandemic a lot of us worked remotely. It is very comfortable and has a lot of advantages, but there are also downsides, similar to social media. We should rely on emails and also chat apps like Teams or Slack. Is it fine if we use them as help, but not as super important things? Most of the time, there are a lot of topics to discuss and there will be a lot of processes that are running without your participation. It may cause FOMO effect and additional stress.  

Solution

Work in async way as much as possible. You do not have to know about everything in your company, or even in your team. If someone sends you some questions, it will not ruin the world to send answers after a few hours, really. If possible, do not use work tools on your phone. Quick example: it is Friday evening; you want to rest but you will check your work email or chat… It is very possible that you will read about something important, and you will think about a solution, real rest will not be possible. Remember that it is not like working in a factory. You cannot bring machines from the factory to your home, but with office work, you will always carry your head, brain and all things inside with you.